By: Kenneth Stepp
Oh yes. The fairy tale ending has to be true. Why? Because at some point, we all went headlong after it. That many people can’t be wrong. Or can they? I spent years studying ballistics. I know, because of those studies, the JFK kill shot did not come from behind him, nor by one shooter. Yet, the nation, that watched the same film I did, believed it. Less and less these days though.
Over 40 dating is treacherous. At least it has been for me. Online friends, one date wonders, and complete misunderstandings have made me recoil more than a few times. Blending personalities together after packing large bags of baggage over this many years seems impossible most days. Yet, we continue. Are we wired or programmed to believe in “the fairy tale”? You know, finding the truest love on the planet and living happily ever after. Does this exist? The correct answer, like most of my answers, I do not know.
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I have learned the magic of “I don’t know”. It’s the perfect answer. It proves I’m human and is honest. Refreshing in a world where knowing is simply a Googling away. Today is no different than any other day. I will work from my laptop from my couch as the sun rises. Then I will choose a quaint town in my state to explore. While there, I will find a local eatery and finish my work there. Or at least get more of it completed. I always make friends with the restaurant staff and a few patrons while there. I love people and find their stories about life, uplifting most of the time. Yep. My life rocks.
Exploring little, historic towns is as much about exploring the human condition as it is about old architecture and history. Learning the history about the town, helps me understand the mindset of the people that built it. Lives are that way too. I look at mine. There are days when I simply can’t look at my past anymore that day. There are so many moments I would like to have back. Many to correct my actions. But even more to slow down and enjoy certain moments more. Many of those times are gone now. I can’t get them back. The odds of me hitting the big lotto is far better than me being able to “fix” some of those moments. I wonder what my life would look like if I could?
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My fairy tale ending is much like the people I have interviewed about this dating over 40 world. I have requirements that she must meet. Smart, strong, independent, open minded, nonjudgmental, and has the capacity to love unconditionally. The last thing is huge. Most believe they can love unconditionally, few have that ability. Then there are my wants. She would like art, theater, drive a truck, and have my sense of childlike wonder when discovering new things. Lastly. Practical things. She can cook, wants a clean home more than me, has a steady paycheck (I work for myself, feast & famine), and is detail oriented.
We all have a list. Either spoken, written, or kept in the confines of our brain. Think about when you first meet someone. We are all imagining certain things. Some naughty, nice, or simply practical. Think of what your fairy tale ending looks like. Mine gets simpler as each day passes. I want someone that will love me back. I have only experienced it once. I want that again. Maybe this time I can reach past my baggage and hers, and will have what it takes to hold on to her.
Founder, American Angel Works
